CNJ+ April 2026

I Remember Dad: REMEMBERING THE UNKIND LETTER By Richard Mabey Jr.

In early September of 1971, I turned 18 and began my college studies at County College of Morris. At that point in time, my father was a bit short handed for scout leaders, in his role as Scoutmaster of Boy Scout Troop 170. Mr. Jack Floyd Sr. was the only one Assistant Scoutmaster in Troop 170. At the time, the troop only had about three or four Committee man. Dad had asked me to help me lead the scout troop as an Assistant Scoutmaster. I gladly accepted my fa ther’s vote of confidence in my role as a scout leader.

Executive was there. When we walked into the room, the Scout Executive asked Dad if he could talk to him out side, alone. Mr. Floyd and I were very con cerned about what the Chief Scout Executive could be telling Dad. I re member looking outside the meeting room window and seeing Dad and the Scout Executive walking around the green grass. When the two men came back into the meeting room, they both looked very happy. After the District Round Table Meeting, Dad told Mr. Floyd and me what the Scout Executive told him. Dad was so happy to tell us that the Scout Executive told Dad that he was one of the best Scoutmasters in the entire Morris-Sussex Area Council. Then, Dad showed Mr. Floyd and I a copy of the letter the Scout Executive had written to the disgruntled scout father. The letter praised my father to the end of the earth. The Scout Execu tive’s letter made it clear as day, that he strongly felt that my dad was one of the best Scoutmasters in the entire council. In a subtle way, the Scout Ex ecutive kind of scolded the scout father for not seeing the forest for the trees. And, for not seeing how fortunate his

It was in mid-September that the fateful letter was written by one of the scout fathers in the troop. The letter was written to the Chief Scout Executive of the Morris-Sussex Area Council. The letter basically stated that this father felt my father should be removed as the Scoutmaster of Boy Scout Troop 170. This scout father’s entire reason, for writing this terrible letter, is that my father used improper English when talking to the scouts. This scout father was not accusing my father of using curse words. In all my life, I had never heard my dad ever use a curse word. Rather, this scout father had kept track of the number of times that he heard my father said the word “ain’t” and used double negatives in a sentence.

A very rare photograph of my beloved father, from when he was a young man.

son was to have such a wonderful Scoutmaster like Richard Mabey Sr. The long and short of it all, it was a most beautiful letter that the Chief Scout Ex ecutive had written, praising my father’s dedication as a Scoutmaster. My father served as dedicated Scoutmaster, of Boy Scout Troop 170, for 30 years. I loved my father with all my heart. He was one of the wisest men I have ever known. It’s been almost 20 years since Dad went Home to be with the Lord. I still miss him, all so very much. Now at 72 and battling this horrible heart disease known as Hypertrophic Cardiomyopathy, I am fully aware that my time on earth may soon be end ing. If there are some words I can share with my readers, it is these words. Be kind to one another. Do not be too quick to find the fault in other people. Forgive, forgive and forgive those who have done you wrong. None of us have a guarantee that we will see the sun rise tomorrow. Cherish each and every moment of life. Love one another. Simply put, love one another. Richard Mabey Jr. is a freelance writer. He has recently had two books pub lished. He currently hosts a YouTube Channel entitled, “Richard Mabey Pres ents.” Richard may be contacted at richardmabeyjr@gmail.com.

This scout father was very bold in writing the Chief Scout Executive, be cause he mailed a carbon copy to Dad. I will never forget this moment. It was a Saturday afternoon. I climbed the stairs down to the basement of the old Mabey Homestead. There was Dad sitting at his workbench. He wasn’t tinkering, fixing a toaster, he wasn’t building a birdhouse, he wasn’t organiz ing his hand tools. Dad was sitting on his work bench crying. At 18, the only other time I had seen my dear father cry was the fateful day in mid-May of 1968, when he got the telephone call that his father had passed away. I felt Dad’s pain as he showed me the horrible letter that the scout father had mailed to the Chief Scout Executive. My father had spoken words of comfort to me dozens of times. From the time I got cut from my high school baseball team, till the time Penny Lan caster wrote me from Rutgers University that she had begun dating another boy. Now, it was my time to speak words of comfort to my beloved father. Fast forward two weeks later, in late September of 1971. Dad, Mr. Floyd and I were attending the District Round Table Meeting. The Chief Scout

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APRIL 2026