The Lightkeepers

25

“ Let go, let go, lemme go. ” My words were rushed and slurred, barely audible between the

violent sobbing that had possessed my body. The person behind me sighed.

My mother stood at Ellie ’ s feet, her head hung low. Her lips moved in silent words as she

clasped her hands in front of her. The arms around me disappeared. Snow continued to fall and

mingle with the stickiness on Ellie ’ s lips. They clung to her lashes. I swept the hair from her face

with hesitant fingers, caressing her paling cheek. Another set of arms wrapped around me. My

father had joined my mother. Henry lifted me with some effort, an arm supporting my shoulders

and another under my knees. I placed my arms loosely around his neck, twisting myself until I

could see Ellie, still unmoving. I wanted to see her chest rising and falling. I needed to see her turn

her head and smile and ask me to join her in the sun. I needed her to be alive.

Tears flowed down Henry ’ s cheeks. Silently, he carried me up the completed staircase and

didn ’ t stop until we were at his landing, where the window looked out over the ocean rather than

the yard. We clung to each other. Goosebumps and shivers plagued my body. He wrapped his arms

around my shaking frame and I leaned into him. I buried my head in the crook of his neck,

squeezing my eyes shut, muffling the sound of my sobs against his skin. My legs were wobbly.

Every nerve in my body vibrated. All I could see was Ellie dropping to the ground, doubled over,

clutching her neck, seconds after the zombie had fallen in a finally dead heap. Her lips were so

bright against her death brushed skin. Would she reanimate? Would we let her? What then? What

now?

I thought of Ellie sitting in the sun, her eyes twinkling as she reclined on a beach towel,

her eyes screwed shut. She ’ d let the sun kiss her skin. She ’ d let its rays transform her into a glowing

goddess and laugh and say, “ Come join me, Rae! ” before she ’ d turn over and lie on her stomach.

Something like thunder clapped. I flinched, crying out. That memory was gone, replaced

by the more recent scene of stickiness and crystalline snow.

Ellie wouldn ’ t walk the earth again.

But she shouldn ’ t be dead in the first place.

The door below squeaked open and shut again. Henry and I remained motionless. Shuffling

could be heard before a static moment of silence. Soft steps tentatively climbed the stairs. A firm

hand gripped my shoulder. I shook my head, not lifting it. The hand disappeared, and Henry

wrapped his arms tighter around me.

“ Rae? ” Mom started hesitantly.